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Old 07-06-2011, 06:36 PM   #961
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Heyheyouttamyway!

You get a better digital camera for your landscapes, but it turns out to be a "badder" camera instead, mischievous even, often trying to "improve" your landscape shots either by giving them weird tints of orange or purple, adding way too much flash, and of course, inserting pics of hairy fat men scratching their butts.

I wish I had a nice tall glass of ice-cold mango-passionfruit juice right now.
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Old 07-06-2011, 07:55 PM   #962
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Zjong!

You have a nice glass of mango-passionfruit in front of you right now. Unfortunately when you start to drink it it turns out that the juice is so passionate it hugs your face, choking you in the process. Your horns start to quiver and you slowly turn orange. Two seconds later you lay on the floor. Dead as a doornail. The juice keeps hugging you until it's evaporated and leaves a sticky mess on your face.

I wish I weren't awake right now. It's 6 AM for Diana's sake.
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Old 07-07-2011, 01:54 AM   #963
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CALIBAN

You fall asleep, but you have a dream in which you are awake at 6AM and cannot get to sleep. Additionally, in the dream, your perception of time is altered so that one second is equivalent to an hour.

I wish I could find a job for the summer!
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Old 07-07-2011, 03:19 AM   #964
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*zing- zap*

You find a summer job but it is shoveling horse poop after the daily parade.

I wish I knew how to swim.
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Old 07-07-2011, 05:08 AM   #965
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Quaznagadgian!!

You gain the power to swim better than any who ever came before you - the skills of the master god-king swimmers run through your veins!!
... but the one condition of possessing these unholy and incredible powers is that they disappear when you come into contact with any liquid.

I wish the Arrested Development film would come out sooner
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Old 07-07-2011, 06:02 AM   #966
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* Donk.

The film comes out immediately but is a documentary about the band Arrested Development.



Actually I would probably watch that!

I wish I wasn't so socially inept.
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Old 07-07-2011, 06:20 AM   #967
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Whoooshhhhhhhhh!

Suddenly you know how to deal with people and you everyone wants to be friends with you. You now have a ton of friends that are always on your head, eat all your food, borrow all your clothes , call you at 2, 3 and 4 am in the morning and borrow all your money. It seems you're very popular, and also hungry, naked, very sleepy and broke!

I wish I could go on a tropical vacation this summer.
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Old 07-07-2011, 06:57 AM   #968
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kate me View Post
I wish I could go on a tropical vacation this summer.
Granted, but you go there by ship, and the ship ends up in storm, and you find yourself in the see holding on to some log, after some time you wake up on the beach of some deserted island with nothing but your clothes on yourself. Is it your dream come true or your worst nightmare?

I wish I lived in a big very expensive fully furnished villa with a swimming pool and a garden
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Old 07-07-2011, 11:10 PM   #969
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Baworglublurp

You live in a big, very expensive, fully furnished villa with a swimming pool and a garden.........as live-in cleaner and gardener (your room is one of the closets)

I wish I was a famous adventure game character.
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Old 07-08-2011, 02:09 AM   #970
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Quinlank!

You're Samuel Gordon. The only friends you have like you not for your personality or insights on various murders, but for the novelty of your staggeringly funny voice.

I wish I could play multiplayer Deus Ex with Holden Caulfield.
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Old 07-09-2011, 10:58 AM   #971
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*Pingpong*

You are immediately transported into Catcher in the Rye and you and Holden begin playing Deus Ex together. Unfortunately, it has become a text only game.

I wish bagels and cream cheese weren't so fattening.
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Old 07-09-2011, 05:48 PM   #972
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*zap*
Your bagels and cream cheese have no fat at all...... so that is all you start eating and before long your body lacks in fat and one day just just blow away never to be heard from again


I wish this *&%$*^% head ache would go away ...........ggggggrrrrrrrr
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Old 07-09-2011, 08:59 PM   #973
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Mzonk!

The headache moves to your tooth. Now you have a toothache.


I wish I knew something to wish. My life is near perfect at the moment!
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Old 07-10-2011, 12:29 AM   #974
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Bwoohahahazzzz

Your life is perfect, you have reached all your goals in life and commit suicide. You reincarnate as a Biafran Child and have lots to wish for, only no way to make any of them come true. You die at age four

I wish I could find inspiration for a project I'm working on
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Old 07-10-2011, 11:39 AM   #975
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SBTRKT!

You find inspiration for the project you're working on in the form of a series of letters exchanged between you and a successful executive in the film industry. The executive steals your ideas, and executes them really, really badly (Adam Sandler as a war criminal seeking redemption!? James Gandolfini as his wife!? WHAT IS THIS GUY THINKING?)

I wish I could get a date.
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Old 07-10-2011, 12:27 PM   #976
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hammerite View Post
I wish I could get a date.
*bing -bong*

You ask a girl out and she says yes, and she tells her friends and they all want to go out with you. After two weeks you have so many girls to date, your school work starts to suffer and you flunk out of school.

Quote:
Originally Posted by tsa View Post
The headache moves to your tooth. Now you have a toothache.

I wish tsa's wish wouldn't have come true
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Old 07-10-2011, 12:44 PM   #977
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Oh Bullsie, do you really have a toothache now?

I wish Bullsie's tootache would go away.
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Old 07-10-2011, 03:58 PM   #978
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Kayaka!

Bulldog's toothache goes away but now she gets a deep aching pain in her legs preventing her to do Karate for a month

I wish I could stop thinking about Adam Sandler as a war criminal and Jame Gandolfini as his wife while picturing Charlie Sheen as their teenage Eunuch

Last edited by gray pierce; 07-10-2011 at 04:15 PM.
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Old 07-10-2011, 04:49 PM   #979
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tsa View Post
Oh Bullsie, do you really have a toothache now?

I wish Bullsie's tootache would go away.
yes sweetie I do, but I think that I have fixed it. I have a crown on that tooth and a piece of steak got caught under the crown so I had to get it out. I feel much better thank you


I wish that everyone gets their wish
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Old 07-11-2011, 01:22 AM   #980
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gray pierce View Post
I wish I could stop thinking about Adam Sandler as a war criminal and Jame Gandolfini as his wife while picturing Charlie Sheen as their teenage Eunuch
Farpwingle, farpwongle, farpwungle.

You now constantly think of Adam Sandler as a Smooth Criminal (including the dance moves), James Gandolfini as his fife (the holes allegedly shot through him in a certain season finale help his playability) and Charlie Sheen as their teenage werewolf (the 1957 type, not the 1985 one and sure as heck not the 2011 one)
Quote:
Originally Posted by bulldog View Post
I wish that everyone gets their wish
Zooooooooooooooobrup!

Everyone gets their wish (i.e the words of their wish), lovingly carved in a large piece of granite and dropped from 1,000 feet on their house.

I wish my cat hadn't just tried to leap onto my lap and, having misjudged, ended up hanging briefly by a single paw with all its claws embedded in my knee.
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Cold Topic

A thread most controversial, that’s what I want to start
Full of impassioned arguments, of posting from the heart
And for this stimulation all will be thankful to me
On come on everybody it won’t work if you agree
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