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Adventure Game Scene of the Day — Tuesday 21 January 2014
The brainiac on the left doesn’t know the guy next to her is a plumber because… Plumbers Don’t Wear Ties (1994). This 3DO game has the distinction of supposedly being one of the worst games ever made.
PC Gamer described it as an “irksome and yobbishly executed psuedo-pornographic photo story with the wit and charm of an elephant’s arse” as well as a “shallow, hateful waste of a game, [that] may very well be responsible for having killed the 3DO, interactive fiction, and the whale”
The game is actually the worst rated game on Mobygames by Mobyscore (0.6 of 5 stars) in the adventure genre. It’s even rated lower than the infamous E.T game for the Atari 2600. Not only do I own a copy, but I’ve played every minute of it. My bravery knows very few bounds.
At first it seems to be an FMV game, but aside from the intro there is no FMV to be found, just still photos with voice-overs. The gameplay consists of navigating a series of multiple choice questions similar to a choose-your-own-adventure novel. That’s it. Period.
Truth be told, I’ve had far worse game experiences than this and sat through far worse acting. These were Oscar worthy performances compared to the voice-overs in some of the survival horror games I’ve played and a short game with virtually no gameplay is always better than a long game with utterly broken gameplay to me.
While this is definitely a bad game, it can’t hold a candle to something like Druuna: Morbus Gravis in my opinion, a game so bad that if faced with finishing it or being water-boarded, I would definitely choose the latter.
The screenshot doesn’t appear for me, but I’ve heard of the game from the AVGN episode, as I suspect many of the “0” voters on mobygames. From that it seemed pretty funny, ridiculous on purpose with some soft-porn vibes.
The other funny thing was that the actress tried to cash in on her internet fame when she found out the game has a cult following. Unfortunately her attitude was very healthy, the game was a bit of fun she did as a half-favor to a friend, so there wasn’t much mirth in that.
This 3DO game has the distinction of supposedly being one of the worst games ever made.
It has its (dramatic) moments, though:
I’d like to play this.
Everybody wants to be Cary Grant.
Even Me.
-Cary Grant
Yeah, the AVGN episode on this was very funny. Only reason I’ve heard of it.
Actually, from Bastich’s description, it doesn’t even sound all that bad…
Or maybe even so bad it’s good.
Hence the cult following, probably.
The truth can’t hurt you, it’s just like the dark: it scares you witless but in time you see things clear and stark. - Elvis Costello
Maybe this time I can be strong, but since I know who I am, I’m probably wrong. Maybe this time I can go far, but thinking about where I’ve been ain’t helping me start. - Michael Kiwanuka
On the bright side, few games feature rodeo.
Recently finished: Four Last Things 4/5, Edna & Harvey: The Breakout 5/5, Chains of Satinav 3,95/5, A Vampyre Story 88, Sam Peters 3/5, Broken Sword 1 4,5/5, Broken Sword 2 4,3/5, Broken Sword 3 85, Broken Sword 5 81, Gray Matter 4/5\nCurrently playing: Broken Sword 4, Keepsake (Let\‘s Play), Callahan\‘s Crosstime Saloon (post-Community Playthrough)\nLooking forward to: A Playwright’s Tale
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