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The Erasure of Women
Dear VGP, in response to feeling bad about how this thread makes you feel I sent you a very clumsy & ill thought-out pm to try & counteract that (for the best reasons) to which you gave me the most unpleasant reply & on responding to your wrong assumptions as to my motives you responded with an even worse reply accusing me of potentially harassing you!
But that’s not the purpose of my post here which I wouldn’t have made public if you hadn’t used your status as moderator to delete those pms from my account - they’re just not there any more! What you’ve failed to take into account is that I do have copies of them sent to my email.
I’m not going to disclose the contents publicly but what that action does convey to me is that you’re quite happy to abuse your moderator status to suit your own agenda.
Jesus.
For clarity’s sake: I can’t delete your PM’s from your account. I did not ask for your PM’s and you used them to continue the “discussion”. Because you wanted that. I set clear boundaries.
I just blocked you. Also: I did not abuse any status.
Don’t send unwarranted and unwanted PM’s to people. If you’d like, I might be able to find the content and share it. I really don’t care.
You and yours won. I didn’t make this thread, nor this issue. You are continuing to cross boundaries so you don’t have to acknowledge what you’re doing, for yourself. Just as you sent your “clumsy” pm for yourself. Don’t use me to comfort your cognitive dissonance or to comfort you into thinking you didn’t do anything wrong. It was your decision, based on your feelings. Own up to stuff like that, stop lashing out and acting like you’re the one being hurt.
Enjoy. Your. Forum. Thanks for ruining it for others.
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For clarity’s sake: I can’t delete your PM’s from your account. I did not ask for your PM’s and you used them to continue the “discussion”. Because you wanted that. I set clear boundaries.
No I’m sure you can’t but you can delete your own.
Sending PMs is quite normal & I’m sure that the art of communication would come to a halt if it was always down to relying on an invitation before a PM was sent. Sending & responding to a PM is not normally regarded as harassment.
Yes, I sent you a PM because you stated that you felt ‘harmed’ & yes I wanted to continue a discussion that you refused to participate in. It was for a good reason. I didn’t need you to set clear boundaries (ones that you’ve repeatedly been reluctant to clarify so who would know what they are???)). What I wanted was you to express yourself in your own words rather than substitute with links so I and others could understand why you felt harmed.
I just blocked you Also: I did not abuse any status
. If you’d blocked me you wouldn’t have got my PMS & therefore, I wouldn’t have received replies. I do have copies of all my emails + replies from my/your alleged ‘blocked account’.
Don’t send unwarranted and unwanted PM’s to people. If you’d like, I might be able to find the content and share it. I really don’t care.
I apologise. I didn’t realise at the time of sending that my PM was unwarranted? I was trying to talk to you. But share what you like!
You and yours won. I didn’t make this thread, nor this issue.
I don’t get what you mean about winning & the thread was made on account of women’s rights being impacted on. You’ve made it very apparent that you don’t care about that despite some of us having expressed our support for trans-rights. Are you seriously seeing this whole ‘non-debate’ about a ‘win or lose conflict’ between women & trans-people?
You are continuing to cross boundaries so you don’t have to acknowledge what you’re doing, for yourself. Just as you sent your “clumsy” pm for yourself. Don’t use me to comfort your cognitive dissonance or to comfort you into thinking you didn’t do anything wrong. It was your decision, based on your feelings. Own up to stuff like that, stop lashing out and acting like you’re the one being hurt.
Wow! You keep mentioning ‘boundaries’ but you’ve never really clarified what you mean????
And yes, you have abused your status to try & shut down a potentially reasoned debate which you haven’t really contributed towards despite requests & have only responded to with hostility.
@VegetableParty
Your behavior in this thread, the things you said to people, everything leads to the conclusion that you’ve disqualified yourself as a mod. You don’t have what it takes.
Sometimes, when I clean the rooms, I get a little curious and… erm… you know… snoop through our guests’s stuff. - This Bed We Made
@VegetableParty
You made it look like I changed my own title by adding the words (warning: transphobia) , which proves my point. You should not be a mod.
EDIT: warning has now been removed
Sometimes, when I clean the rooms, I get a little curious and… erm… you know… snoop through our guests’s stuff. - This Bed We Made
This is a very loaded topic, and it’s apparent to me that quite a few people (including mods, but I’m making assumptions) have baggage around the topic. Baggage others cannot see and are likely driving responses in a way that makes others find it challenging to understand their point of view.
For some, breaks should be taken. I’ve read this thread, and -to me- most of this discussion has been respectable. I have not seen any transphobia personally, but I also don’t believe I am the best judge.
If this thread can stay respectful between people and differences of opinion can be acknowledged (not saying everyone has to agree with one another), we can keep things open.
Generally: If only civilized debate was enough as a basis, I wonder why, for example, the political thread in which I discussed the war with seething wolf was deleted, - my posts, his and he as well.
If things were civil on the forum, I wonder why admins go after users. First, with false accusations. Second, repeatedly accuse unfair motives and why they do not apologize or are still admins.
Problem with such topics is often that there is one ‘good’, one prevailing opinion. This often ideologized point of view is often represented by parts of the official side, suggesting to dissenters how stupid they are, whereas, empirically, the allegedly stupid are often more educated, right and months or years ahead of the times.
Ideally, freedom of opinion is not just lip service, but is lived in practice, no matter how it hurts one’s own conviction. Otherwise, it’s an unedifying sham discussion for weak characters of weak societies.
@meteoer, it would be great if you could take your comments/thoughts, as interesting as they are (or well-meaning), to your own dedicated thread rather than using this one.
I have nothing more to say on this subject.
At this point it’s beyond absurd. The erasure of women has to stop.
EDIT: Very few people will support a man winning a beauty pageant + sponsorship. Lots and lots of women (and men) will feel indignation and anger.
Sometimes, when I clean the rooms, I get a little curious and… erm… you know… snoop through our guests’s stuff. - This Bed We Made
As I have said before, this is a sensitive issue for many people, and we don’t need this pot stirred up again.
Difficult roads often lead to beautiful destinations.
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