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Those jokes are priceless, SoccerDude. 
I wouldn’t pay a penny for them, but they are funny.
“Rainy days should be spent at home with a cup of tea and a good book.” -Bill Watterson
One of my favourite jokes as a kid was this:
What’s green and lives a meter under ground level?
The green rock eater.
If you dug a hole through earth and dropped a rock in it, how far would it fall?
One meter, and then the green rock eater would eat it.
Hilarious.
Already back then I really loved a good build up, and I’m being serious here. Still today, many jokes that call back to earlier jokes tend to crack me up.
Currently Playing: Dragon Age Origins: Awakening
Recently Played: Red Embrace: Hollywood, Dorfromantik, Heirs & Graces, AI: The Somnium Files, PRICE, Frostpunk, The Shapeshifting Detective (CPT), Disco Elysium, Dream Daddy, Four Last Things, Jenny LeClue - Detectivu, The Signifier
Why did the Bishop cross the Prague City Square?
She was looking for a Czech mate.
I’m sorry to say we had to fire our frozen pie delivery guy. They always arrived
half-baked because he left them hotboxing in the back of the car.
Why did the Bishop cross the Prague City Square?
She was looking for a Czech mate.
Already back then I really loved a good build up, and I’m being serious here. Still today, many jokes that call back to earlier jokes tend to crack me up.
ROFL, I just posted a bunch of these “consecutive jokes” here only to then find out that I had posted ALL of them earlier in this thread…
See here.
The truth can’t hurt you, it’s just like the dark: it scares you witless but in time you see things clear and stark. - Elvis Costello
Maybe this time I can be strong, but since I know who I am, I’m probably wrong. Maybe this time I can go far, but thinking about where I’ve been ain’t helping me start. - Michael Kiwanuka
ROFL, I just posted a bunch of these “consecutive jokes” here only to then find out that I had posted ALL of them earlier in this thread…
See here.
Yeah, I re-read them now. They are stupid and absurd - and funny.
Currently Playing: Dragon Age Origins: Awakening
Recently Played: Red Embrace: Hollywood, Dorfromantik, Heirs & Graces, AI: The Somnium Files, PRICE, Frostpunk, The Shapeshifting Detective (CPT), Disco Elysium, Dream Daddy, Four Last Things, Jenny LeClue - Detectivu, The Signifier
You know how Chuck Norris can breathe underwater?
He breathes through the gills of his mullet.
1. Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
2. What does a baby computer call its father? Data.
3. What did the custodian say when he jumped out of the closet? “Supplies!”
4. Why are colds bad criminals? Because they’re easy to catch.
5. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
6. Which knight invented King Arthur’s Round Table? Sir Cumference.
7. What do sprinters eat before a race? Nothing. They fast.
I enjoy playing adventure games on my Alienware M17 r4 and my Nintendo Switch OLED.
Bless this thread.
Alright, this is a bit of a political joke. Of sorts.
What’s the difference between Matt Gaetz and Xi Jinping?
One speaks fluent Orange, the other Mandarin.
Why did the single-celled organism fail math?
It multiplied by dividing.
What do you get when you boil a funny bone?
Laughing stock
How is the Force like duct tape?
It has a dark side and a light side, and it binds the universe together.
“Rainy days should be spent at home with a cup of tea and a good book.” -Bill Watterson
Classic. 
Why were the ticks in the market for a home away from home?
The place they lived was a boar.
What did you think of final episode of The Last Door?
Well, I liked how it opened, but then it lost its handle and after that it got increasingly unhinged.
I’m probably recycling some already posted, but I can’t help myself.
What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?
Stuck
When can three elephants sit under an umbrella and not get wet?
When it’s not raining
What do April showers bring?
Wet elephants
What do you get when an elephant runs through your garden?
Squash
What is big, gray, and wears glass slippers?
Cinderelphant
Why does an elephant have a trunk?
Because a suitcase won’t hold all its clothes.
Why won’t the elephants swim in the ocean?
They can’t keep their trunks up.
What do you do when an elephant starts to sneeze?
Run!
Q: How can you fit four elephants in a mini cooper car?
A: Two in the front, two in the back.
Q: How do you know if there’s an elephant in your fridge?
A: You open the door and see the elephant.
Q: How do you know if there are two elephants in your fridge?
A: When the door doesn’t quite close.
Q: How do you know if there are three elephants in your fridge?
A: They laugh when the light goes out.
Q: How do you know if there are four elephants in your fridge?
A: There is an empty mini cooper car parked outside your house.
“Rainy days should be spent at home with a cup of tea and a good book.” -Bill Watterson
Nice, more build-up jokes. 
Did you manage to finish reading “Go Tell It on the Mountain”?
No, I’ll have to stick to the cliff notes.
Why didn’t Kitty join Tomcat on his trip around the world?
He tried to whisker away, but he wasn’t purrsuasive enough.
How do travel to fantasy island?
With a flight of fancy.
My kids are starting to get in on these jokes. 
I got these from them:
Where can you always find money?
In the dictionary.
What do you have when you’re holding six oranges in your left hand and six in your right hand?
Very large hands.
What’s got four legs, and barks?
- A dog?
Oh, you’ve heard that one already… 
My daughter gave me a piece of paper with the words “guess a number between 1 and 20” on it.
I said “16”.
She turned the paper over. The backside read “correct”.
The truth can’t hurt you, it’s just like the dark: it scares you witless but in time you see things clear and stark. - Elvis Costello
Maybe this time I can be strong, but since I know who I am, I’m probably wrong. Maybe this time I can go far, but thinking about where I’ve been ain’t helping me start. - Michael Kiwanuka
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