[Manhunter71]

Originally Posted by natalia

That is very, very cool. I can't wait to see a finished edition! Someday I'll finish my book (or start one that I can actually finish). For now, though, this old fogey is heading off to bed.

I'm off to bed too - after all, us old buggers all need our beauty sleep

[Jake]

I'm already bald and grumbly, what have I got left to fear? Maybe achey joints.

I turn 25 on the 31st and well, I dunno. I turn 25. Ta da! Nothing else to it really.

When I turned 22 I freaked out a little bit about getting old. I mean, before that there were a ton of milestones - "become a teenager" "get a drivers license" "vote/become a legal adult" "drinking age!!!" but at 22 there werent any of those weird age-based rites of passage/privilige left, all that was left was to get old, "become an adult" (somehow? pff) and die. Or become president at 35 It was sort of like coming up to this huge cliff and not knowing where to go from there... but I got over it and am enjoying myself quite a lot.

As a side note regarding being almost 25, I'm a little bummed out that I am no longer "a youth" and connected to "youth culture" - which I didn't think existed until I realized I don't like any of the same things people 3 or 4 years younger than me like. This has been a bit of a problem since due to many things I'm still a college student (almost done finally!) - like, people dont get my jokes because I sometimes talk about things that existed when I was 12 but they were like 8 which is a huge difference when you're that young - but whatever. It's also weird that I'm 10 years older than high school freshmen, and that therefore high school freshmen these days never saw the 80s, but that too doesn't bother me that much. Oh well. Damn kids.

[SakSquash]

I'm afraid of getting older. I don't want to be old and crazy. I just want to be young and crazy.

[Sage]

Oh Jake, you're in for some real treats in the years to come. Just wait until you're twice the age of high school seniors. Or until you see a guy you went to school with and find out it's actually that guy's almost-grown son. Or the first time you get stopped by a cop who is noticeably younger than you. Or when you realize the person you've been having an intelligent conversation with is young enough to be your child.

ScottMate

[Maquisard]

This thread is sad. I think I'll place my vote when I get older, and I can make a mature decesion about it.

[Jake]

Originally Posted by Thrift Store Scott

Oh Jake, you're in for some real treats in the years to come. Just wait until you're twice the age of high school seniors. Or until you see a guy you went to school with and find out it's actually that guy's almost-grown son. Or the first time you get stopped by a cop who is noticeably younger than you. Or when you realize the person you've been having an intelligent conversation with is young enough to be your child.

ScottMate

I don't know if any of those things will shock me all that much. I've already awkwardly been in the intelligent conversation thing only on the other end. Well, okay not intelligent at all in fact, but in high school (1996-1998ish) I worked in a local graphic design/ad studio doing their web coding and we got in a conversation about Star Wars because the special editions had just made their run through the theater.

The conversation had been going on in a pretty interesting and entertaining manner for a while when I asked one of the designers if she'd seen star wars in the theater and she said yes, got all misty eyed and proceeded to tell me at length about how she had a huge crush on Han Solo. This was met with what must have been a pretty puzzled look from me because she stopped dead, causing a very long awkward pause . She stared at me for a bit, and then got pretty embarassed because, of course, she was talking about seeing the movie in 1977 which was three years before I was born, and I was talking about something I'd done for the first time like two months ago.

Granted the conversation was about Star Wars, the dorkiest thing of all time to discuss, but... Well, needless to say it was pretty awkward and I've been aware of that sort of situation and how it must feel from both ends of the spectrum ever since.


Anyway, it definitely didn't make me feel young, because nothing makes you "feel young" until you're already old enough to realize you're not young anymore, but it made me think.

[Intrepid Homoludens]

I voted: I don't give a shit as long as I still get to eat pie.

Ironically, the responses of some of the younger members here (well, at least younger than I) are rather depressing to me, and telling of the attitude they have on aging. It's interesting how people in their early to mid 20s (not all, but many) view getting older as debilitating, even sad - and yet many of them are already in some kind of constraint or other: joblessness; in school and broke; starting out their careers and lives after college; insecure in a constantly shifting world; obligations to prove something to their families, to themselves while carving out a life away from family; issues of sexuality and social placement; falling in and out of romantic relationships; etc.

Based on my own experience, it isn't until you're in your 30s that many things finally begin coming into focus, and that the consequences of a lot of decisions you made in your 20s concretize themselves. You begin to get a sharper sense of yourself and what your boundaries are, whether you set them up yourself or if they're natural extensions of you and formed on their own, and if those boundaries are worth preserving or destroying. Many people in their 30s and 40s, particularly those in their mid to late 30s and 40s, start questioning the value of the choices they've made in all facets of their lives: Was it worth it? Why didn't I? Should I have? I could have done this instead?

I was never, ever afraid of getting older, even when I was in my teens. I think it has a huge amount to do with my sense of self. Even when I was a kid I had an awareness that I wasn't like anyone else, that my path branched away from the main road. Things like my sexuality, imagination, sense of creativity, how I touch others and how they touch me, were acutely innate, and somehow I knew that. Most importantly I just accepted them as givens.

But the coolest thing about it all was that somehow - I had no idea how - but somehow, I knew that the older the I get, the more sense it'll make to me, and the more incredible my life would become because of it, because everything was wide open for me.

[Jake]

Heh. I was up late at a friends house a few weeks back and one person there randomly asked everyone if they wished they could go back and relive high school, and of course before anyone else could answer immediately said she would and started listing everything she wished she could do differently. It was really sad. The end.

Also Trep I hope your post wasnt re: my previous posts.

[Intrepid Homoludens]

Yours and some others here. I hope you're not insulted, it's just that it's a very complicated, layered issue. You can never pin it down, how you feel about the things you value, precisely because you're constantly being exposed to new experiences that may or may not change you in some way or another - an encounter with a cancer survivor, the death of someone you know who was only 11 years old, a homelesss person you meet who used to be a corporate exec during the 80s, relocating for a job or someone you love, getting pneumonia, buying your first house or car.

What you thought were solid ideas you had about the world, about yourself, could gradually or suddenly change at the drop of a hat, and you're forced to question your values and what they mean now as opposed to when you were still in college or living with family.

[Jake]

Originally Posted by Intrepid Homoludens

Yours and some others here. I hope you're not insulted, it's just that it's a very complicated, layered issue. You can never pin it down, how you feel about the things you value, precisely because you're constantly being exposed to new experiences that may or may not change you in some way or another - an encounter with a cancer survivor, the death of someone you know who was only 11 years old, a homelesss person you meet who used to be a corporate exec during the 80s, relocating for a job or someone you love, getting pneumonia, buying your first house or car.

What you thought were solid ideas you had about the world, about yourself, could gradually or suddenly change at the drop of a hat, and you're forced to question your values and what they mean now as opposed to when you were still in college or living with family.

I don't really know what you're talking about. I'm sure you're going to now smugly tell me that's the whole point and that I'm naive or something due to being young.

Really though, I rarely know what you're talking about.


Edit: Can't forget the smiley at the end to make everything I just said sound friendly:

[Intrepid Homoludens]

Nah, wasn't any kind of looking-down-at lecture. It's more of a stream of thought process. Basically I'm saying that things change all the time and you find yourself re-evaluating meanings on your life.

[Jake]

I know that, it's practically the driving principle of my life.

[Intrepid Homoludens]

That's how I got attracted to the philosophy of Taosim - the sense of lightness from being unattached and of allowing things to happen on their own terms, and saying "this happens, and it's what it is and I'll work with it." In some ways I've stopped re-evaluating and forcing ideas, and I realized that I got here, at this moment of my life, not because of what I wanted but because I was me.

You should read The Tao Of Pooh by Benjamin Hoff:

"When you wake up in the morning, Pooh," said Piglet at last, "what's the first thing you say to yourself?"

"What's for breakfast?" said Pooh. "What do you say, Piglet?"

"I say, I wonder what's going to happen exciting today?" said Piglet.

Pooh nodded thoughtfully.

"It's the same thing," he said.


When you discard arrogance, complexity, and a few other things that get in the way, sooner or later you will discover that simple, childlike, and mysterious secret known to those of the Uncarved Block: Life is Fun.

[Melanie68]

I've thought about changing decisions I made in my life but then if I did that, I wouldn't be the person I am today - complex, screwed up at times but still me and definitely OK.

[Intrepid Homoludens]

Originally Posted by Lao Tzu, b. 600 BC

When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be

Hmmm....

[omloflump]

I don't wish to be old because it's socially unacceptable to be wise below your years. And youth's fire burns out, to be replaced with wretched responsibility and soul-destroying drudgery. Then again, I don't do much typically youth-oriented tasks (drinking and... the other thing) so it'll probably be exactly the same but more stable and depressing. Frankly I prefer myself with more flaws. I wouldn't mind so much if I was married to someone and we could rot together, though. It really depends on my social situation.

[Erwin_Br]

I only fear going bald. I already have two bay areas (Phil Collins style), and I hope I don't get one of those alien landing sites on top of my head.

--Erwin

[natalia]

Originally Posted by Melanie68

I was incredibly shy (but I still am), geeky, awkward and blah looking when young. I was very into school. Never went to parties, didn't date (until I was 20) and all around missed out on a lot of the experiences that go with being young. I gained some confidence at 20 and beyond (with the help of alcohol) but didn't fully come into my own until just recently. And I've been barreling through school the past 8 years and have sort of put my life on hold(schools been a lot longer than that, I just had a 3 year break working during which my life was also on hold and sucked). So I feel like my best years are coming up. I am definitely not afraid of getting old. Now I am trying to take better care of myself so I can have many more years.

I didn't mention this before, but OMG, Melanie, this was the very picture of my teenage years as well. I was a total bookworm in highschool, chubby, and fairly nerdy. I lost some weight my freshman year in college fell in with that devil alcohol and was suddenly not invisible anymore. It was a fun few years, although it did make me rethink my respect for certain people who responded to me totally differently when I had lost the weight. /offtopic.

[RLacey]

Getting older only worries me when I think about it.

Though I'm still at the stage where getting a little older is fine .

[SakSquash]

Originally Posted by Intrepid Homoludens

I voted: I don't give a shit as long as I still get to eat pie.

Ironically, the responses of some of the younger members here (well, at least younger than I) are rather depressing to me, and telling of the attitude they have on aging. It's interesting how people in their early to mid 20s (not all, but many) view getting older as debilitating, even sad - and yet many of them are already in some kind of constraint or other: joblessness; in school and broke; starting out their careers and lives after college; insecure in a constantly shifting world; obligations to prove something to their families, to themselves while carving out a life away from family; issues of sexuality and social placement; falling in and out of romantic relationships; etc.

Based on my own experience, it isn't until you're in your 30s that many things finally begin coming into focus, and that the consequences of a lot of decisions you made in your 20s concretize themselves. You begin to get a sharper sense of yourself and what your boundaries are, whether you set them up yourself or if they're natural extensions of you and formed on their own, and if those boundaries are worth preserving or destroying. Many people in their 30s and 40s, particularly those in their mid to late 30s and 40s, start questioning the value of the choices they've made in all facets of their lives: Was it worth it? Why didn't I? Should I have? I could have done this instead?

I was never, ever afraid of getting older, even when I was in my teens. I think it has a huge amount to do with my sense of self. Even when I was a kid I had an awareness that I wasn't like anyone else, that my path branched away from the main road. Things like my sexuality, imagination, sense of creativity, how I touch others and how they touch me, were acutely innate, and somehow I knew that. Most importantly I just accepted them as givens.

But the coolest thing about it all was that somehow - I had no idea how - but somehow, I knew that the older the I get, the more sense it'll make to me, and the more incredible my life would become because of it, because everything was wide open for me.

Quit freaking me out! I kind of have this idea that living past 70 is unnatural and only afforded to us because of medical science, but in doing so we spread ourselves thin. Hell, in fact, at that age, you already start to decay while still being alive. The skin shrivels, your teeth go bad and start to fall out, your hair falls out...you just start to break down. If I can live to 70, i'll be happy. Anything past that will be painful.