"Shebop, hebopaweebop" all world leaders are wise and benevolent, and are then quickly overthrown by their military leaders and all become dictatorships due to military boredom.

I wish my kids were grown up and out of the house.

^^ *Whoosh* Me and all my clones become world leaders.

^ Your kids are all grown up and out of THEIR HOUSE and living in YOUR HOUSE.

I wish men's soccer would become a popular sport in the US, replacing football as the national sport.

*ding* To avoid confusion with the rest of the world, soccer gets renamed to football and American football gets renamed to soccer. Therefore, men's soccer is now the national sport.

I wish those days could come back once more.

*boooiiiink* and they did: those days when you had the flu.

I wish I could have a massage.

^^ Don't worry they always do.. to haunt you

^Schlokorino! You get a massage from a 500 pound gorilla named Oscar The Unholy.

I want and ergonomic keyboard

*teeeeng!* You now have all the necessary alpha/numeric and function keys surgically implanted in your thighs. All you need to do is sit in front of the monitor and incessantly tap your fingers on them - at the expense of your family and friends trying to force you to see a shrink for uncontrollable compulsive behaviour.

I wish Jason Statham were gay and had the hots for me.

*Phhhhhffft!* Wish granted! However, you are now your straight.

I wish they'd get someone good to do the half-time show at the Super Bowl, and not let people like Prince ruin good songs.

*Zawinnkly-woozoo!!*

They get someone good to do the SuperBowl...but no one watches, and the SuperBowl gets cancelled forevermore.

I wish I were healthier, so I could go out and socialize more.

*Phhhhhffft!* Wish granted! You get healthy, you socialize, and get sick again.

I wish that I could think of something to wish for without actually have to wish for something to wish for.

lol, that sounds about right....

*PEHTOOOOWEEE* You now have everything you ever dreamed of having. You die of boredom.



I wish I could go to London for an all expenses paid one month holiday, including all the hot hunky male escorts I could handle.

Granted*

Every time you think of a wish you have a brain fart and forget the wish.

I wish for a beach vacation

*GGGGRRRRGGGLLLPPHH-SPLAT!!!* You're now in Cap Cod wearing a bathing suit.......and it's January.

I wish I had a teleporter so I could visit whichever friends I had at any given time.

POOF

http://www.baseuno.com/sergio/archiv...teleporter.jpg you now have a teleporter, but the first time that you use it the aliens capture you and give you a probe. They return you to earth to go about your business.

I wish for pancakes

:9~ Do the aliens look like Jason Statham?

*KAPLEESH!* A waitress appears with a nice plate of hot fresh ones. Unfortunately they're completely out of syrup and everything else to go with it. You're forced to consume dry pancakes while shivering in your bathing suit on that Cape Cod beach in January and the waitress is pissed off 'cause you have no money for tip.

I wish there were a gay bar within walking distance from my house.

*Ickingsleeeeeee!* A gay bar opens up right underneath your house. It plays loud music all day and night, and as a result you're never able to get any peace and quiet.

I wish upon a star.

You have a teleporter, but it ages whatever is transported through it a year each time. Soon it is stolen from you by wine merchants. Then it's stolen from the wine merchants by the aforementioned team of unscrupulous scientists.

A fanatically republican coup overthrows the US. They invade cuba and change it into "gayland", and you are deported there.

You are filled with an undeniable compulsion to stare upon a star as much as possible.

Circumstances force you to move to alabama. You gain a job perk: all expenses paid 1 month hollidays to either of the londons there.

I wish american football was renamed collisionball, crashball, smashball, tackleball or something along those lines to eliminate confusion.

:9~ Mmmm, hot southern hunks with their southern drawwwwl. Plus I get to live near Sagesie.

*PLOOP!!* Now all kinds of sports around the world involving balls are simply named 'sportsball'......to eliminate confusion.


I wish could get off my lazy arse and get some errands done today.

*Pivbooskaa!* American Football is renamed "Collisionball, Crashball, Smashball, Tackleball or Something Along Those Lines to Eliminate Confusion", but the extremely extended name puts off the sponsors and the game collapses amidst financial difficulties.

You get up and go to do your errands, only to realise that the entire lower half of your body was left behind in the chair. You're now able to levitate, but miss wearing trousers.

I wish people would always use "your" and "you're" correctly.

*glip*
All of the human race learn how to spell correctly, although the newfound ability to be articulate and eloquent now causes most laymen to quit their lowly but necessary jobs in the belief that they should all go out and write a book on their life.

I wish that all my fellow chit-chatters would be reduced to their component atoms, thus killing the thread.