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Everybody wants to be Cary Grant.
Even Me.
-Cary Grant
Jim Morrison was so disappointed that the only concept he knew about life ‘Sex, Drugs and Rock N’ roll’ still remains in the afterlife.
Look carefully at this picture for three or four minutes. Now, can you tell which character is bigger, the one inside the car or the skeleton (the right one)?
The one in the car you say. well You’re wrong! don’t believe? cover the left one with your hand, now cover the right one. Surprising, isn’t it?
but don’t feel bad, most people have the same illusion.
Dave was annoyed that the best three seats in the house were taken by just one guy. The strippers too were hoping that the guy’s wallet was as fat as he was…
The casting director was over the moon with the actors that had arrived to play the Dalton Brothers in the new Lucky Luke movie. The angry Joe and the big and dumb Averell were perfect. Now he’d only need one more of the middle brothers…
His pet zombie loved fetching the stick, but letting it go again afterwards always was trouble…
The ghost didn’t manage to scare her, but that portrait on the other hand…
The truth can’t hurt you, it’s just like the dark: it scares you witless but in time you see things clear and stark. - Elvis Costello
Maybe this time I can be strong, but since I know who I am, I’m probably wrong. Maybe this time I can go far, but thinking about where I’ve been ain’t helping me start. - Michael Kiwanuka
The new recruit to the fire-service was pleased to have the opportunity to practise sliding down poles - her colleague was praying that she didn’t want to practise fireman’s lifts as well!
COSMETIC SURGEON: “Sure - I can make you look like Brad Pitt but we’re out of anaesthetic at the mo so just bite your teeth on this.”
Feeling weak and anemic? Try our new Ferric Bar! Guaranteed to make you an Iron Man!
“Rainy days should be spent at home with a cup of tea and a good book.” -Bill Watterson
If it wears motorcycle helmet, we can kill it.
Recently finished: Four Last Things 4/5, Edna & Harvey: The Breakout 5/5, Chains of Satinav 3,95/5, A Vampyre Story 88, Sam Peters 3/5, Broken Sword 1 4,5/5, Broken Sword 2 4,3/5, Broken Sword 3 85, Broken Sword 5 81, Gray Matter 4/5\nCurrently playing: Broken Sword 4, Keepsake (Let\‘s Play), Callahan\‘s Crosstime Saloon (post-Community Playthrough)\nLooking forward to: A Playwright’s Tale
SALES REP: “Our motto is that scyize matters - for your line of work can I recommend up-grading to our super-deluxe enormous version as I can see that you currently might need that.”
The girl who loved her anaemic looking & permanently legless boyfriend had second thoughts on meeting his mother.
After many months of search, Dave finally managed to find Trunkyo. He was slightly fatter than the last time, but the reason why he doesn’t bother to post in the AG forums any more is now revealed…
Glottis’s “DOD car” costume for the Halloween was one of the most uninspiring ones.
100 renowned dentists confirm that “riflebar” is the best product around against tooth decay.
Ghost: She was my mother-in-law. She chained me to death, when I told her that I forgot to feed her cat.
the zombie friend understood the meaning of quite hunting , but he didn’t.
Even as a zombie, the pilot lived by his motto “death from above”.
The truth can’t hurt you, it’s just like the dark: it scares you witless but in time you see things clear and stark. - Elvis Costello
Maybe this time I can be strong, but since I know who I am, I’m probably wrong. Maybe this time I can go far, but thinking about where I’ve been ain’t helping me start. - Michael Kiwanuka
“Maybe it was a mistake to order a rifle made out of chocolate”
I am baaaaaaaack!
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