[Ninja Dodo]

How about we start the Narrative Collective again?

This is basically the more serious and complex version of the 3 word story. No joking please (unless it's ironic and respective of the atmosphere), let's see if a truly fascinating story comes out of this. Your contributions should be at least one sentence long, but no longer than a paragraph. Leave the last sentence trailing, open to continuation by the next participant. Introduce new characters, or bring back original characters others have created. Take us anywhere you want, across the street or across dimensions.

Posting evocative images is strongly encouraged, and can only enhance this collabarative effort. After several pages I'll save everything into a file, and send it to whomever here is interested, as well as keep a copy for myself as a springboard for future fiction.

I'll start.

She was smiling.

She always smiled, faintly, with a glint in her eye as if no one but her could see what was so amusing about everything. He'd only really met her once before, on platform five...

It was a Friday. He was late for work. So was the train.

He drew in his sketchbook as the station clock ticked diligently away towards the train's not so imminent arrival. He barely noticed when she sat down next to him.

- "What are you drawing?" she asked suddenly.

- "Hrm? Er... oh just--"

[Intrepid Homoludens]

( h gawd, not this again!!)




She promptly yet gently took the sketchbook from his hands. The drawing was far from finished, but it was clear to her that he was rendering the station around them. "You're trying to catch the morning light, aren't you?"

He was startled. No one would have guessed that! He watched as she very lightly traced some of the lines with her finger.

"Chiascuro," she continued. "Working from dark to light. But I can see how it would be a little tricky for anyone with so much of this area pierced by the sun at this angle. I'm George, by the way."

[Jake]

"Actually I was going for more of an AOC type thing, if you know what I mean?"

"AOC? --"

"Awesome Obstacle Course."

"Oh," she said, and took a slow step back.

[Intrepid Homoludens]

"Oh, but don't worry!" he immediately said, attempting to salvage himself. "It's not as bad as you think."

She composed herself and sat back down. "Not as bad? What do you mean?"

"Well, it seems like an awesome obstacle course, but in fact it's a very awesome obstacle course, you see."

He watched her shoulders relax, her eyes shift to the side in thought.

She said, "How do you know it's very awesome?"

"Some smart-ass named Jake told me."

[omloflump]

"Oh," she said statically. "I'm Heraldo, by the way."
"Heraldo?"
"Yes, my parents were Swiss missionaries."
"I thought your name was George."
"It is. Heraldo George."
"Which do you prefer?"
"Neither; I don't use 'em myself. Never been into that 'third-person' rubbish," she said. "Speaking of which, what's your name?"
"Dionysus." he replied.
"The Dionysus?"
"No, just a Dionysus."
She nodded reflectively and began running her delicate fat fingers through her greasy hair.
"I suppose you want to sleep with me," she said.
"It had crossed my mind," admitted Dionysus.
"Here?"
"No, I was thinking of a hotel or something."
"Pity."
Dionysus coughed nervously.
"We could do it here..." he blurted.
"It'll cost you."
"What?!"
"Joking. But no, I've been leading you on," she said. "My father won't let me screw strangers."
Dionysus froze.

[Intrepid Homoludens]

But then he quickly thawed out. "He doesn't? But we just introduced ourselves, didn't we?"

"Good point."

"Where's the nearest hotel?"

"Don't you have to go to work?"

"I could call in sick. Besides, the train has been 20 minutes late as it is."

"I'm a lesbian."

"Really? We could find......a third. Another woman."

"I have a big dildo in my bag. Are you into...."

"NO!"

"Pity. My friend Giselle loves dildoes and men."

"I don't do kink."

"Of course you don't. You merely like sitting in train stations attempting to pick up girls by doing drawings. How boring is that?"

[omloflump]

"It worked with you, didn't it?" he said icily.
"Yes, but it was out of pity."
"I'm sure it was."
There was a glaring pause.
"Well, if you're not going to play along, I'll be off," said Heraldo finally.
"Wait, I'm not all boring," called Dionysus desperately.
"No?"
"No. I like watersports..."
"Really?"
"Yes."
"Sorry, I'm not into that Hitler shit."
"Oh. Piss off then."
"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" she smiled wickedly.
Dionysus scowled and looked away.
"There's something I must tell you," said Heraldo earnestly.
"What?"
"I'm your daughter."
"Emily?"
"Yes."
"Why, I haven't seen you since you were but a tadpole."
"That's right. And now I'm a sprightly teen."
"18?"
"15."
"Close enough. Are we still going to..."
"You're not serious."
"Well, it's not like I've raised you."
"That's true. All right, let's go."
They began walking.
"There's something else I must tell you," said Heraldo.
"Yes?"
"I'm not your daughter."
"Oh. Pity."
"You sick man."
"What?"
"You were actually going to sleep with your daughter."
"What's wrong with that? A family that plays together..."
"Have you no morals?"
"I've a few."
"You need help."
"Help? Ha! If anything, this is a sign I have royal blood in me."
"Unbelievable."
"Do you know my daughter?" asked Dionysus.
"No."
"So you don't know where she lives?"
"No. Shouldn't she be with her mother?"
"Oh yes! I never thought of that. I think I'll go there now. Care to tag along?"
"You're joking, right?"
"I've seldom been more serious in my life."
"Can I bring the dildo?"
"Go ahead. My ex-wife's into that sort of thing."

[Intrepid Homoludens]

After he made a brief phone call announcing to his secretary that his train was cancelled, thus he wouldn't be coming in, Dionysus and George left the station, and he finally took a good look at her. She was sultry!

"Yeah right, like you're really gonna get a piece of me," she suddenly spat out.

"You know," Dionysus said irately, "you're nothing but a trampy tart. Why the hell are you even going with me?"

"I'm bored. Even trampy tarts get bored, you know."

"Well, lucky me, right?"

"I think you're lying, Dio. Can I call you that? I think you're making up this whole thing with your ex-wife and dildoes. I bet you've never even been on an awesome obstacle course, let alone a very awsome one!"

Before Dio could even respond, a strange midget in a Harris tweed suit ran up to them, carrying a little red plastic bag and trying to catch his breath.

"Excuse....me....but, can I....ask you a.....big, big.....favour?"

Dio looked at him, then looked at George, then back at the midget. "Um, are you okay?"

"Yes! Yes, I am. I just need to ask you to do something for me. It will only take a minute."

"We're sort of in a hurry, mister," George interjected.

"Yes, I'm sorry," the midget replied. "But please, it will just take a minute of your time. I promise."

The midget motioned them to follow him around the corner, and they stopped at a pub. The midget had a worried look on his face. "Would you please hold this little bag while I go in there. I'll be right back out."

"Why would you need me to hold your bag? Can't you take it in with you?"

"Well, it's very complicated. I'll explain later. Here."

The small man handed the red plastic bag to Dio. George let out quite an audible sigh, indicating how annoyed she was. Dio shook the bag, feeling the weight, and wondered what was inside.

"Thanks so much," the midget said. "I'll be right back."

The midget had just barely disappeared into the pub when George tried to take the bag from Dio.

"Let's see what's inside!"

Dio yanked it back from her. "I don't think so. He asked us to hold it, not peek at the contents!"

"Oh c'mon! Don't be a tight ass! He won't know. Show some curiosity, will ya? What, d'you think it's something dangerous? You're paranoid."

"I am not!" Dio shook the bag again. For its smallness it seemed a little too heavy to just contain anything. As George watched he loosened the white string, gave it to her, and opened the bag and looked in.

"OH MY GOD!!! WHAT THE F - !!!!!" George shrieked. The smell was overwhelming. Dio grabbed the string from her and retied it in seconds.

"What the hell is a midget doing carrying a bag of shit around?!!!" he said out loud.

[Ninja Dodo]

"That's just stupid," she said backing away slowly.

"Yeah..."

[Ninja Dodo]

"I think I'll be going now," he said as the train approached the station.

"Yeah me too."

He left the bag on the platform.

[Hammerite]

Meanwhile, Bob was out shopping for his mother, Rosmerta on account that she could barely move because of her arthritic legs, head, brain, teeth, arms and hands... he'd always thought about leaving... but he never had the heart until today.
"Bobby, dear! My arthritis was cured by this wizard, he's my new husband!" said Rosmerta.
"I can perform magic never seen ever even in your wildest dreams."
"Wow." said Bob, who was offended.
"I know."

[UPtimist]

It would however turn out how little did he know.

Bob walked out with an odd, glazed look in his eyes. He walked around the corner of an old brick house from the late 19th century.

He walked. He walked to a platform and saw a woman and a man with a red plastic bag. They left it on a wooden bench and didn't look at it again.

"Never trust a midget with a red plastic bag and a rush" the woman said right befor jumping into the train from a just-opened door.

Bob felt an urge to see what they were talking about. He now realized that the wizard Rosmerta talked about was indeed a midget. He couldn't believe it was just a coincidence and had to see what was in the bag. He slowly moved towards the bag, one hand in front of his face in case it would be a bomb. He opened the bag and cringed. He coughed in disgust, but gathered his guts and opened it again.

The train started moving. Through the window Dionysus looked in horror at what a man was about to do with the bag. He didn't notice that Heraldo George came sitting next to him.

Bob needed to see if there was a connection. He took a deep breath through his nose to smell if what he feared was true.

Spoiler:

This isn't turning out to be such a geat story, is it?

[Hammerite]

It was!
"It is!" exclaimed Bob.