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Old 02-14-2007, 10:48 AM   #361
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No.

Well, okay fine, your PC now is one of those machines with umpteen ultrasparc cores.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MoriartyL View Post
There's no difference between saying "I wish for that" and saying "I want that". They're synonyms. And you are one terrible wish-granter.
This coming from the guy who started the notion that anything with the word had in it has to refer to somehing in the past.

I wish for death by meteor for my high school accounting teacher.
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Old 02-14-2007, 10:52 AM   #362
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Quote:
Originally Posted by undeaf View Post
This coming from the guy who started the notion that anything with the word had in it has to refer to somehing in the past.
It was a one-time joke; if I'd known it would be repeated, I wouldn't have used it. And if one person said, "I only take wishes with the word 'wish' in them", I wouldn't have minded, but this is already getting ridiculous.
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Old 02-14-2007, 11:17 AM   #363
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Too bad, people just don't like your tone. It doesn't have to have the word wish in it "gimme some nestea, retarded bottle dweller" might work to.

Last edited by undeaf; 02-14-2007 at 11:25 AM.
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Old 02-14-2007, 02:10 PM   #364
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Quote:
Originally Posted by undeaf View Post

I wish for death by meteor for my high school accounting teacher.
THUD! Your high school accounting teacher is suddenly hit by a giant meteor. Unfortunately, since you were in the same building as him, you are too. By a miracle you survive. The school is rebuilt and the teacher replaced by a gorgeous woman. You attend every class to feast your eyes on her, but unfortunately you don't hear anything she says and you fail the final test miserably.


I wish I could control my internet addiction.
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Old 02-19-2007, 08:03 PM   #365
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*>ffffssssssssssssk<*

Granted. You lose interest in the internet and resume your previous commercial TV addiction, which is pretty narrow form of info input.

I wish I had not developed an allergic reaction to beer (can you imagine?).
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Old 02-19-2007, 08:14 PM   #366
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*fo-shizzle!*

You don't have an allergic reaction to beer, you now have a 24-hour-if-you-stop-drinking-beer-you-die dependency.


I wish my groceries were always handed to me for free.
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Old 02-20-2007, 01:46 AM   #367
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*ping!* Your groceries are handed to you free, but they are all past the use-by date and you die of food poisoning


I wish I could make women go weak at the knees with a glance
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Old 02-20-2007, 05:18 AM   #368
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SSH
I wish I could make women go weak at the knees with a glance
*zing*

You are now Sean Connery


I wish I were alot smarter
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Old 02-20-2007, 06:20 AM   #369
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*Sproing!*

You are now The Brain, a laboratory mouse, who, along with his dull-witted cagemate Pinky, longs to take over THE WOOOOOORLD!!

I wish I could turn on the TV and never have to hear "news" about Anna Nicole Smith's baby or death, ever again.
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Old 02-20-2007, 08:01 AM   #370
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*prooooshshshsh* Your TV no longer gets any signal.

I'd like a surprise party for my birthday tomorrow, from all the people I've been friends with in my life! (There were around five of them.)
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Old 02-20-2007, 12:54 PM   #371
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*palovkalovmelancholovskich* you get a surprise party, but you are so surprised that you get a heart attack and are rushed to hospital. Upon returning, you see that one of your friends took a dump on your sofa and drank all your cold lemon Nestea.
You still had some... but it was diet.

I wish I could soar through the skies majestically.
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Old 02-20-2007, 01:30 PM   #372
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*Splooshka!*

You are propelled majestically skyward by some unseen force, and love the freedom of flight, right up until you pass through the Earth's atmosphere and become a Krispy Kritter.

I wish I could relive any moment in time whenever I wanted to.
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Old 02-20-2007, 01:39 PM   #373
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*zikazikazikazika*
At any moment of your choosing, you may relive a moment of your life. But you can't control which moment, so it could be any one.

Okay, that's too easy. It's so easy that it's covered in the wish's 30-day warranty. I'll fix that for you.

*akizakizakizakizOOLA*
Now you have control over which moment to go back to, as well as which moment to go back from. But then you're stuck there- you can't return to your original time. Once you realize that your entire life is open to you, most of your dreams become subconscious wishes to relive older, happier moments of your life again. (The subconscious doesn't worry much about the dangers of such things.) And since your wish didn't differentiate between waking desires and sleeping ones, well- WOOSH. You're going to be trapped as a little kid for a very long time. It'll be like Groundhog Day- you'll only get out when it's so perfect that you no longer have any desire at all to redo everything.

Still, the subconscious can be pretty unpredictable...




Now my wish. I wish to be mildly addicted to creative writing.
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Old 02-20-2007, 01:46 PM   #374
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Wish granted, but you get a huge writers block.

I wish my truck would stop getting stuck in ditches.
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Old 02-21-2007, 01:33 AM   #375
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*zing!* Your truck explodes into a million pieces, none of which end up in a ditch

I wish for a free ham and swiss cheese croissant to magically appear on my desk right now
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Old 02-21-2007, 05:16 AM   #376
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*zazu!*

A free ham and swiss cheese croissant magically appears on your desk...along with a wrapper that says, in very tiny print, "best eaten until 1/07/2000".

I wish I could have my second book published.
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Old 02-21-2007, 05:30 AM   #377
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*Zing*

Your second book is published but does not sale very well because of all the spelling errors.


I wish for a new cat
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Old 02-21-2007, 05:32 AM   #378
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LeisureSuitedLooney
I wish I could have my second book published.
*Woop-woop-hoola!*

Your second book is published as part of a series of books for aspiring novellists entitled "How Not to Write".


Quote:
Originally Posted by bulldog
I wish for a new cat
*Zing-zing-ziggie-za!*

You're given a whip with nine knotted cords on it. And then your captain takes you up onto the main deck and proceeds to beat you senseless for threating to start a mutiny.



"I wish people who have trouble communicating would just shut up." [Tom Lehrer]
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Old 02-21-2007, 05:40 AM   #379
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*fizzle-snap*

The world suddenly becomes mute.

I wish I could live at the Playboy mansion.
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Old 02-21-2007, 08:35 AM   #380
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*GODZILLA*
You live at the Playboy mansion. But you're now gay.

I wish I was the hottest hunk in town
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