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Old 06-01-2006, 12:45 AM   #1
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Default 12-year-old AOLer translator.

ha.

i just used it to translate smashing pumpkins 'rocket'

Quote:
BLED IN UR OWN LIGHT
DRAM OF UR OWN LIEF
I MIS M3
I MIS 3VERYTHNG IL NEV3R B
AND ON AND ON

I 2RCH MAH SU 2 SHOW TEH WORLD TAHT IM PUR3
DEP INSIED MAH H3ART
NO MORE LEIS

A CROWN OF HORNS
AN IMAEG FORM3D D3FORMAD DA MARK IVA BORN3
A MARK OF SCORN 2 U

CONSUME MAH LOVE DAVOUR MAH HAET
ONLY POWARS MAH ASCAEP DA MON IS OUT DA STARS INVIET
I THINK IL L3AEV 2NIGHT

SO SON IL FIND MYSELF ALON3
2 RELAX AND FAED AWAY
DO U KNOW WUT COMNG DOWN
DO U KNOW I CUDNT STAY FRE??!?!?

I SHAL B FRE
I SHAL B FRE
I SHAL B FRE
I SHAL B FRE
I SHAL B FRE FRE
FRE OF THOS3 VOIECS INSIED M3
I SHAL B FRE
I SHAL B FRE
here
--be
-link
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Old 06-01-2006, 01:03 AM   #2
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That is profoundly disturbing.
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Old 06-01-2006, 01:09 AM   #3
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I don't teach language, but if I was an English teacher I'd cry a bit.
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Old 06-01-2006, 01:12 AM   #4
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Oh, that's just *awful*.

L3T US GO THAN U AND I
WH3N TEH 3VENNG IS SPREAD OUT AGANEST TEH SKY
LIEK A PATEINT ETHERIESD UPON A TABLE
LET US GO THROUGH C3RTANE HALF-DESERT3D TEH MUTARNG R3TRAATS
OF RESTLES NIGHTS IN ONA-NIGHT CHEAP HOTALS
AND SAWDUST R3STAURANTS WIT OYST3R-SH3LS
STRETS TAHT FOLOW LIEK A T3DIOUS ARGUMENT
OF INSIDIOUS INTENT
2 LAAD U 2 AN OVARWHELMNG QUESTION …
O DO NOT ASK WUT IS IT”
LET???!! WTF LOL US GO AND MAEK OUR VISIT
111!111 OMG LOL
IN TEH ROM TEH WOMEN COME AND GO
TOKNG OF MICHALANGELO111!11!1 OMG WTF
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Old 06-01-2006, 02:16 AM   #5
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Lol, thats funny.
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Old 06-01-2006, 03:00 AM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LenaJ
I don't teach language, but if I was an English teacher I'd cry a bit.
When I studied A-level English, mobile phones were just starting to become popular and so was the 'text talk' associated with them. The examiners were obviously keen to be "down with the kids", so the exam paper actually had a section on the semantics of this trendy new shorthand...

I think the teacher was pleasantly surprised that not only did we, the students, cry a bit, but none of us actually used text talk... at least not to the extremes the examiners seemed to think!
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Old 06-01-2006, 03:11 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Huz
I think the teacher was pleasantly surprised that not only did we, the students, cry a bit, but none of us actually used text talk... at least not to the extremes the examiners seemed to think!
I'm very much old school when it comes to everything written. I even write my e-mails and text messages correclty. I'm no language reactionary though. I understand all languages change with time. New words emerge. In our case we're very much influenced by English for instance.
It would be nice though if text talk didn't spread all over and into magazines and books. Don't you think!?
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Old 06-01-2006, 03:45 AM   #8
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Now Is Teh Winter Of Our Discontent
Maed Glorious Sumer By This Sun Of York
And Al Teh Clouds Taht Lourd Upon Our House
In Da Dep Bosom Of Da Ocean Bureid
Now111!!!!! Wtf R Our Brows Bound Wit Vic2rious Wraaths
Our Bruiesd Arms Hung Up For Monumants
Our St3rn Alarums Changed 2 Mery Metngs
Our Dreadful March3s 2 D3lightful Measures
Grim-visaegd!1!11! War Hath Smothd His Wrinkled Front
And Now Instaad Of Mountng Barded Steds
2 Fright Teh Sus Of Fearful Adversareis
Ha Caeprs Nimbly In A Ladys Chmbr
2 Teh Lascivious Pleasng Of A Lute
But1!1! Omg Wtf I Taht M Not Shaepd For Sportiev Trix
Nor Maed 2 Court An Morous Lokng-glas
I Taht M Rudely Stmpd And Want Loves Maejsty
2 Strut Bfor3 A Wan2n Mblng Nymph
I Taht M Curtaled Of This Fare Proportion
Cheaetd Of Faature By Dis3mblng Nature
Deform3d Unfinishd S3nt Bfor3 Mah Tiem
In2 This Br3athng World Scarc3 Half Maed Up
And Taht So Lmely And Unfashionable
Taht Dogs Bark At Me As I Halt By Y I In This Weak Pipng Tiem Of Paaec
Haev No Dalight 2 Pas Away Da Tiem
Unles 2 Spy Mah Shadow In Teh Sun
And D3scant On Mien Own Daformity
And Their Since I Canot Prov3 A Lover
2 Antartane Thase Fare W3l-spokan Days
Im D3termiend 2 Prov3 A Vilane
And Haet Da Idle Pleasures Of Thes3 Days
Plots!11!!!! Omg Wtf Haev I Lade Inductions Dangerous
By Drunken Proph3ceis Liebls And Dr3ms
2 Set Mah Brother Claernc3 And Teh Kng
In Deadly Haet Da Ona Aganest Teh Othar
And If Kng Edward B As Tru3 And Just
As Im Subtla Fals3 And Traacherous
This Day Shud Claernce Closely B M3wd Up
About A Proph3cy Which Says Taht G
Of Edwards Heirs Da Murderer Shal B
Diev!1!!! Lol Thoughts Down 2 Mah Su H3r3
Claernce Comas
!1!111 Wtf Lol
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Old 06-01-2006, 03:46 AM   #9
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Will would be proud.
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Old 06-01-2006, 03:48 AM   #10
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Gaaaaaarrgggh! MY ALLERGIES. *flees*
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Old 06-01-2006, 06:02 AM   #11
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I wrote a story specificaly for this!

K SO I WAS WOKNG DOWN TEH STRET TH3N THIS GUY CMA OUT AND HE WAS LIEK HEY BITCH GIEV ME UR MON3Y AND I WAS LIEK IMM 2 AEWSOM3 2 GIEV U MONEY SO HE GOT PISED OF AND PULED OUT A PARE OF DES3RT AAGLAS AND SADE I ANET GONA TEL U TWIEC BITCH WHICH LED 2 ME HANDNG HIM A NIEC CUP OF SHUT TEH FUK UP!11111 OMG WTF ONC3 H3 HAD DOWN3D TEH WHOL3 MUG H3 REALIESD HIS WRONG DONGS AND GAEV MA TEH DEAESRT AAGLES THEN A SWAT T3M SWUNG DOWN FROM A HALICOPTAR!1!! I HAD 2 THINK QUIK SO I RAN ACROS DA WAL 3MPTYNG DA CLIP IN2 DA TAM AND ESCAEPD IN THIS RICH GUYS CONVERABLA WHICH H3 WAS ABOUT 2 HAND OVAR 2 DA VAL3Y PARKNG1111!!! I PLOWAD THROUGH DA SHOPNG MAL AND RMPAD OVER DA OCEAN LANDNG IN AUSTRALIA THRE WEKS L8R AND TAHTS Y I HAEV A PAK OF DNGOS FOLOWNG M3

Makes a bit more sense this way
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Old 06-01-2006, 06:22 AM   #12
Not like them!
 
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Hey, I think that's an improvement! From now on, you should always run your forum posts through the translator- you sound more sophisticated this way.
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Old 06-01-2006, 06:26 AM   #13
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Well its certainly working for you so why not!
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Old 06-01-2006, 06:35 AM   #14
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WUT UP?!??! OMG WTF LOL (translated from "What's up?")
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Old 06-01-2006, 07:20 AM   #15
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Quote:
{201} AND I SAW AN ANGAL COMNG DOWN FROM H3AEVN HAVNG TEH KAY OF TEH BOTOML3S PIT AND A GR3AT CHANE IN HIS HAND
{202}!!!1111! OMG WTF AND HE LADE HOLD ON DA DRAGON TEH OLD SERPANT WHICH IS TEH DEVIL AND SATAN AND BOUND HIM FOR A THOUSAND YAARS
{203}!!!111 WTF LOL AND H3 CAST HIM IN2 DA BOTOMLAS PIT AND SHUT HIM UP AND S3T A SEAL UPON HIM TAHT HE SHUD NO MORE S3DUCA DA NATIONS TIL DA THOUSAND YEARS B FINISHAD111!1!!1 WTF LOL AND AFTER TAHT HA MUST B LOSED A LITLE TIEM
{204}1!!!1 LOL AND I SAW S3ATS!!!!1 LOL AND THEY SAT UPON THEM AND JUDGM3NT WAS GIEVN UN2 THEM!1!11 OMG WTF LOL AND TEH SUS OF THEM TAHT WER3 BH3AEDD FOR DA TASTIMONY OF JESUS AND FOR DA WORD OF GOD AND WHO HAD NOT ADORED DA BAST NOR HIS IMAEG NOR RECEIEVD HIS CHARACTER ON THERE FORAHEADS OR IN THEYRE HANDS!!!!! OMG LOL AND TH3Y LIEVD AND REIGNED WIT CHRIST A THOUSAND YAARS
{205}11!!1 LOL DA R3ST OF TEH D3AD LIEVD NOT TIL DA THOUSAND YAARS W3RE FINISHAD1!!!!! OMG WTF LOL THIS IS TEH FIRST R3SUR3CTION
{206}!111!!! OMG WTF BL3S3D AND HOLY IS HE TAHT HATH PART IN TEH FIRST R3SURECTION11!!!11! WTF IN THES3 TEH SECOND DEATH HATH NO POWER1!!!!1 OMG WTF LOL BUT THAY SHAL B PREISTS OF GOD AND OF CHRIST AND SHAL REIGN WIT HIM A THOUSAND Y3ARS
{207}!!!!1!1 AND WH3N DA THOUSAND YEARS SHAL B FINISHED SATAN SHAL B LOSED OUT OF HIS PRISON AND SHAL GO FORTH AND S3DUCE DA NATIONS WHICH R OV3R TEH FOUR QUARTERS OF DA EARTH GOG AND MAGOG AND SHAL GATHER THEM 2GETHER 2 BATLE TEH NUMBR OF WHOM IS AS TEH SAND OF TEH SAA
{208}!1!1!11! LOL AND THEY CME UPON DA BREADTH OF TEH EARTH AND ENCOMPAS3D DA CMP OF TEH SANETS AND DA BLOVED CITY
{209}1!!111 WTF LOL AND THEIR CMA DOWN FIER FROM GOD OUT OF HEAEVN AND D3VOURAD THEM AND TEH D3VIL WHO SEDUCED TH3M WAS CAST IN2 DA POL OF FIER AND BRIMS2N3 WHERA BOTH TEH BAST
{2010} AND TEH FALS3 PROPHET SHAL B 2RM3NTED DAY AND NIGHT FOR AVAR AND EVER
{201}!!1111! OMG WTF LOL AND I SAW A GRAAT WHIET THRONE AND ONE SITNG UPON IT FROM WHOSA FAEC DA 3ARTH AND HAAEVN FL3D AWAY AND THEYRE WAS NO PLAEC FOUND FOR TH3M
{2012} AND I SAW TEH DEAD GRAAT AND SMAL STANDNG IN DA PR3S3NC3 OF TEH THRON3!1!!111 WTF AND DA BOKS W3RA OPENED AND ANOTH3R BOK WAS OPENAD WHICH WAS DA BOK OF LIEF!1!1 OMG WTF AND TEH DEAD W3RE JUDGAD BY THOSE THNGS WHICH WARE WRITEN IN TEH BOKS ACORDNG 2 THERE WORKS
{2013}1111 AND DA SEA GAEV UP TEH D3AD TAHT W3RE IN IT AND DEATH AND HAL GAEV UP THERE DEAD TAHT WAR3 IN THEM1!1111! OMG WTF LOL AND THEY WER3 JUDGAD EV3RY ON3 ACORDNG 2 THEYRE WORKS
{2014}1!!11! OMG WTF AND H3L AND DEATH W3R3 CAST IN2 DA POL OF FIER111! WTF LOL THIS IS DA SECOND D3ATH
{2015}!!!11! WTF LOL AND WHOSOEVER WAS NOT FOUND WRITEN IN TEH BOK OF LIEF WAS CAST IN2 DA POL OF FIER!111!1 OMG WTF

Eeep...


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Old 06-01-2006, 07:23 AM   #16
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Quote:
FOR GOD SO LOVAD TEH WORLD TAHT HA GAEV HIS ONLY BGOTAN SON TAHT WHOSOEV3R BLEIVATH IN HIM SHUD NOT PERISH BUT HAEV EVERLASTNG LIEF!!!!!11 WTF
Riiiiiiight...
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Old 06-01-2006, 09:01 AM   #17
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There are probably much funnier versions of this.
 
Old 06-01-2006, 07:49 PM   #18
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I don't care how stupid they are I don't think that kind of rampant misspelling is common in even 12-year-olds on AIM.
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Old 06-02-2006, 02:21 AM   #19
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My stunning photographic memory tells me this thing was used for Evan's AG April's fool article two years back.
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