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Old 09-13-2006, 11:59 AM   #10841
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Up next, "understanding Hamlet", fact, fiction, and theories. We guarantee no less than 10 posts and 35,000 words on the subject!
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Old 09-13-2006, 12:00 PM   #10842
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jelena
Oh, and why don't I tell you all about the ultimate way of teaching 10 year olds about fractions?
Really? You would? That would be great!

Can you give me some time to eat food with lots of additives and sugar so I'm in the right frame of mind to appreciate it?
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Cold Topic

A thread most controversial, that’s what I want to start
Full of impassioned arguments, of posting from the heart
And for this stimulation all will be thankful to me
On come on everybody it won’t work if you agree
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Old 09-13-2006, 12:01 PM   #10843
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Hamlet is easy to understand.

It's a mild cigar to be smoked to the strains of Air on a G String.
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Cold Topic

A thread most controversial, that’s what I want to start
Full of impassioned arguments, of posting from the heart
And for this stimulation all will be thankful to me
On come on everybody it won’t work if you agree
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Old 09-13-2006, 12:02 PM   #10844
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How about "learning piano" in 5 easy lessons?
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Old 09-13-2006, 12:08 PM   #10845
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No, wait! The "how-to's" of office life! Learn how to survive as a white-collar worker in a office environment.
Including:
*decorating your cubicle!
*being diplomatic with your co-workers!
*bathroom and lunch breaks!
*office coffee!
*7.00-3.00 hours!
*living in a lifeless environment!
*and much more

Only on the "thread must die" thread!

Only $9.95!

Wait! for you, we'll make it..... free! That's right, 3 hours of office fun.. Free!
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Old 09-13-2006, 12:14 PM   #10846
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stepurhan
Really? You would? That would be great!
Wow! I've got one person in the audience.

Quote:
Can you give me some time to eat food with lots of additives and sugar so I'm in the right frame of mind to appreciate it?
Of course. Just nick some Kit Kats from Rob when he turns his head away and you'll be all set!

*ahem, ahem*Well it all starts with a bunch of different coloured papers of A4size. We all start by folding and cutting the blue paper into halves. Once you're finished you take out a red paper and fold and cut it into fourths (expr and sp for all the fractions?) Continue with new colours to make eightieth, sixteenths and 32ths.
Now you've got the equipment to play the fraction game.
Bring a dice with said fractions of instead of the usual digits 1-6. Play with a friend and both of you should have a white papwer of A4size in front of you.
Start by throwing the dice and see what fraction the dice shows you. Aha,
1/4. The you're allowed to take one of your red fourths and put that on top of your white paper. Your friends turn.....
The one who first covers the whole white paper with different fractions win!
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Old 09-13-2006, 12:17 PM   #10847
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I suppose I could bore you to death by publishing extracts from my new "Show and Tell" autobiography. All the scandal! All the excitement! All the drama!

It's very short.
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Old 09-13-2006, 12:19 PM   #10848
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What with ice fishing and fractions, the Swedish are possibly as boring as I've been led to believe the Fins are.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jelena
Once you're finished you take out a red paper and fold and cut it into fourths (expr and sp for all the fractions?)
That's quarters my dear.
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Old 09-13-2006, 12:20 PM   #10849
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oh, the boredom, your killing me

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Old 09-13-2006, 12:20 PM   #10850
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If this Thread™ goes any further I'll start writing in a "hilarious" mock-Dan Brown style. You wouldn't want that, would you?
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Old 09-13-2006, 12:22 PM   #10851
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See Jane run. Dick sees Jane run. Run, Jane, run! Spot, run with Dick! Spot runs with Jane.
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Old 09-13-2006, 12:25 PM   #10852
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jat316sob
the Swedish are possibly as boring as I've been led to believe the Fins are. .
Nah, that's just me.
Quote:
That's quarters my dear.
Sounds a lot better.
(My really heavy dictionary 'said' fourth. )
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Old 09-13-2006, 12:35 PM   #10853
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Failed Thread™-killer Giligan flung himself backwards in his chair, sliding away from the computer. In the dim light from the monitor he saw the blood on the floor, and knew that it was his own.

"You should have turned off the printer," cackled the voice of the other man.

Staring into the face of the large, red-faced clown, Giligan arched an eyebrow, trying in vain to give off the impression that he couldn't care in the slightest. Though he knew that the dot matrix printer, perched on the desk to his right, was one of the early models from 1970 - the Digital Equipment Corporation's LA30 - he found it hard to believe that a small deviance from the 30 character/second speed limit could have caused the printer ribbon to fly off the printer, striking him in the chest.

Giligan stared at the clown, his eyebrow raised. "How? And why?"

"Sabotaging the LA30 was simple," came the reply. Giligan knew instinctively that this was true; the model had always been susceptible to damage due to its lose hood.

The clown continued. "As for why, it is to do with the Thread™. You know too much. Or perhaps you just think that you do. Either way, your elimination was a necessary measure."

Giligan winced. He was wondering when that subject was going to come up. Summoning up every remaining ounce of energy that he possessed, he struggled to his feet.

"You should not have done that, Mr Giligan."

As the vintage P08 Parabellum fired a shot, and Giligan collapsed to the floor, his final thoughts were those of satisfaction. He had left the required message, and now he just had to hope that they would see it.
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Old 09-13-2006, 12:39 PM   #10854
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Don't mock me, miffer!

Although, it is an excellent piece of literature. (I take it that Jelena is the clown?)
I'll use it and take the credit for it, no less!

Quote:
Originally Posted by RLacey
As the vintage P08 Parabellum
You might have killed me off with something better than a Luger.
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Old 09-13-2006, 12:42 PM   #10855
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Giligan
You might have killed me off with something better than a Luger.
True, but that would have required more than five minutes of research.

Of course, my story has one thing going for it that Dan Brown doesn't have... most of the random and totally unnecessary facts thrown in to make myself appear clever are actually true.

Coming Soon: Robert reads the rest of the Dan Brown novels and rights his own that spoofs every one of them at the same time!
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Old 09-13-2006, 12:44 PM   #10856
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RLacey
True, but that would have required more than five minutes of research.

You should be more like me. Me, I'm an expert in weapons and knew exactly what a P08 Parabellum was as soon as I read the sentence.
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Old 09-13-2006, 12:55 PM   #10857
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Well, it is a famous World War II weapon.
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Old 09-13-2006, 01:03 PM   #10858
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Many people know what a Luger is, but how many people know that a P08 Parabellum is the technical name for a Luger? Not many, I guarantee you.
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Old 09-13-2006, 01:06 PM   #10859
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While that's true, a cursory Google search would have given you the answer.
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Old 09-13-2006, 01:14 PM   #10860
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RLacey
Well, it is a famous World War II weapon.
Allow me to remind you, Lacey, that the Luger was considered an antique during WWII. It was the German's official sidearm (along with the Mauser C96) during WWI. The P-38 Walther was the Kraut's official WWII sidearm.
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