[Jelena]

Originally Posted by Squinky

I've recently started using a menstrual cup in lieu of pads and tampons. Highly recommended.

I've heard about those, but dismissed it right away since I figured it would be very uncomfortable.

Originally Posted by SSH

If the men aren't already scared off, I'll start with stories about my vasectomy.

I could tell you a story or two about giving birth. Placentas have been a topic in these neighbourhoods before.

[Squinky]

Originally Posted by Jelena

I've heard about those, but dismissed it right away since I figured it would be very uncomfortable.

On the contrary, you can barely even feel it once it's inside, and it reduces my cramps a little bit, too.

[Giligan]

Do you have any idea how nasty that is? What is wrong with you people?

[Sage]

I've heard menstrual cups are the preferred method of professional ballet dancers for dealing with visits from "Aunt Flo", so I'd imagine they'd have to be both effective and comfy.

[Sage]

Originally Posted by Giligan

Do you have any idea how nasty that is? What is wrong with you people?

If you're a straight guy, then dealing with your partner's menstruation is a fact of life- get used to it. It's a perfectly natural and normal part of life and nothing to freak out over. Just wait until you have to make a late-night run to the drug store to buy whatever products your partner prefers... there is an entire aisle devoted to "feminine protection", and all the boxes look disturbingly alike. As a basic tip, either bring the empty box with you or get your partner to write down EXACTLY which make/model/variety she uses (like a prescription), along with a "Plan B" choice in case the drug store is out of the preferred one. This IS NOT a situation where "close enough" will do.

[Jazhara7]

Originally Posted by Sage

If you're a straight guy, then dealing with your partner's menstruation is a fact of life- get used to it. It's a perfectly natural and normal part of life and nothing to freak out over. Just wait until you have to make a late-night run to the drug store to buy whatever products your partner prefers... there is an entire aisle devoted to "feminine protection", and all the boxes look disturbingly alike. As a basic tip, either bring the empty box with you or get your partner to write down EXACTLY which make/model/variety she uses (like a prescription), along with a "Plan B" choice in case the drug store is out of the preferred one. This IS NOT a situation where "close enough" will do.

I remember when we were in America, we went to the store because my cousin needed "feminine protection" products. So we stood in front of the shelf, and nothing really looked familiar. We also wondered why there were pads for men too...then we realised we were standing in front ot "incontinence protection" shelf.

Come to think of it, it was rather odd overall, to see such a huge shelf of incontinence supplies. I can't recall ever seeing that much in a German store, or any at all, even. Is incontinence very widespread in the US? O.o


-

[Giligan]

Originally Posted by Sage

If you're a straight guy, then dealing with your partner's menstruation is a fact of life- get used to it. It's a perfectly natural and normal part of life and nothing to freak out over. Just wait until you have to make a late-night run to the drug store to buy whatever products your partner prefers... there is an entire aisle devoted to "feminine protection", and all the boxes look disturbingly alike. As a basic tip, either bring the empty box with you or get your partner to write down EXACTLY which make/model/variety she uses (like a prescription), along with a "Plan B" choice in case the drug store is out of the preferred one. This IS NOT a situation where "close enough" will do.

Well, there goes any chance of me getting married.


Seriously, I'm straight, but it's easy to understand why some guys are gay.

[Sage]

Originally Posted by Jazhara7

I remember when we were in America, we went to the store because my cousin needed "feminine protection" products. So we stood in front of the shelf, and nothing really looked familiar. We also wondered why there were pads for men too...then we realised we were standing in front ot "incontinence protection" shelf.

Come to think of it, it was rather odd overall, to see such a huge shelf of incontinence supplies. I can't recall ever seeing that much in a German store, or any at all, even. Is incontinence very widespread in the US? O.o


-

I've noticed the phenomenon you're speaking of (giant sections of relatively small stores devoted entirely to incontinence supplies) and it's a relatively recent thing, only having manifested in the last ten years or so. It may have something to do with the aging baby-boomer population in the US, the youngest of which are now in their mid-sixties.

[Squinky]

If Men Could Menstruate

'Nuff said.

[rlpw]

Hey, I have been known to have to make a run for pads and/or tampons several times. When you live in the middle of 3 women you will learn to do what it takes.
I just want to know one thing. Is PMS an excuse to get back at men for everything they have done wrong during the previous month?

[Squinky]

From here:

If an issue comes up a lot during "that time of the month," that doesn't mean she only cares about it once a month; it means she's bothered by it all the time and lacks the capacity, once a month, to shove it down and bury it beneath six gulps of willful silence. Those are the things most worth paying attention to. (By both people involved.)

In other words, you're sort of right.

[Sage]

Originally Posted by Squinky

From here:

In other words, you're sort of right.

Understood, and agreed with. However, I've got to wonder why (some) women bother to "bury with six gulps of willful silence" an issue they feel strongly about?

Here's my theory: Women seem to be determined to credit we men with emotional range and sensitivity that we simply do not possess. Let me see if I can't paint a picture of the man's side of the example used in the linked article...

<Woman goes into the bathroom after Man>
*loud sigh*

What's the matter?

Nothing!

<Man takes "Nothing!" to actually mean "nothing", or at least nothing pertaining to him, and thinks no more about it for the next three weeks... despite hearing that same loud sigh every morning... until the day he's confronted with a shrieking harpy threatening to rip his throat out over an issue he has never heard mentioned before.>

Ladies, here's the deal: We men are like puppies. We can be incredibly adorable without even trying, but we also have a propensity for accruing bad habits. Also like puppies, in order to cure us of our bad habits you have to correct us THE SECOND WE'VE SCREWED UP, not hours, days, or weeks later. Rest assured, when you crawl all over us for something we've been doing long enough for it to become a habit our first thought is "She's gone crazy. I've been doing that for ages and she's never said a word about it before, but today out of nowhere she starts screaming about it".

[Giligan]

I hear you, man. Women are annoying.

[Fantasysci5]

haha This is an awesome conversation.

[Squinky]

Originally Posted by Sage

Ladies, here's the deal: We men are like puppies. We can be incredibly adorable without even trying, but we also have a propensity for accruing bad habits. Also like puppies, in order to cure us of our bad habits you have to correct us THE SECOND WE'VE SCREWED UP, not hours, days, or weeks later.

Thing is, most women are brought up to believe that calling people out on their bullshit is bad manners. And it sure as hell doesn't help that women who are upfront about what bothers them are routinely referred to as "bitches", both by men and by other women.

Oh, and referring to men as a group as incapable of emotional sensitivity is pretty damn insulting, if you ask me.

Originally Posted by Giligan

I hear you, man. Women are annoying.

Fuck off.

[Sage]

Originally Posted by Squinky

Thing is, most women are brought up to believe that calling people out on their bullshit is bad manners.

I'd say it depends on the manner in which people are "called out". I see nothing rude about or wrong with telling someone "Please stop doing that" in a polite but firm tone the first time they do it. The second time they do it, tell them to stop doing it again and explain why it is bothersome. If they do it a third time, knowing full well that it is bothersome, then the use of extreme measures such as shouting and/or threats is perfectly acceptable in my opinion. It's not the "calling out" itself that's rude, it's the manner in which it's done that requires some finesse and adherence to established protocol.

Originally Posted by Squinky

And it sure as hell doesn't help that women who are upfront about what bothers them are routinely referred to as "bitches", both by men and by other women.

I may vary from the norm in this, but in my book a woman (or man) who is upfront about what bothers her (or him) is a person to cultivated as a friend and someone who's honesty and integrity is something to be applauded.

On the other hand, anyone who is bitter and hateful, finds nothing but fault in everything and everyone around them, and complains relentlessly about things in which they have no stake and over which they can exert no measure of control IS a "bitch"... whether they happen to be male OR female. But that's just my opinion.

Originally Posted by Squinky

Oh, and referring to men as a group as incapable of emotional sensitivity is pretty damn insulting, if you ask me.

Okay, what I said was...

Originally Posted by Sage

Here's my theory: Women seem to be determined to credit we men with emotional range and sensitivity that we simply do not possess.

,
but as it was never my intention to imply that men are entirely lacking in emotional range and sensitivity, perhaps I could have expressed that thought better.

Submitted for your perusal, an amended version:

Originally Posted by Sage

Here's my theory: Women seem to be determined to credit we men with a breadth of emotional range and a level of sensitivity that we simply do not possess.

Better?

[Squinky]

Originally Posted by Sage

I see nothing rude about or wrong with telling someone "Please stop doing that" in a polite but firm tone the first time they do it.

True. Would you, however, agree that women and men are held to different standards when it comes to what constitutes "polite" behaviour on their part?

Originally Posted by Sage

On the other hand, anyone who is bitter and hateful, finds nothing but fault in everything and everyone around them, and complains relentlessly about things in which they have no stake and over which they can exert no measure of control IS a "bitch"... whether they happen to be male OR female.

Give me an example, and please refrain from using evolutionary psychology, if possible.

Originally Posted by Sage

Submitted for your perusal, an amended version:

Better?

Actually, it's the "simply do not possess" that I'm least happy with, because I have known and known of men who are just as emotionally expressive and sensitive, if not moreso, than what society paints as the "average" woman. Such men range from famous poets in classic literature to certain regulars on these very forums. I also know women who are so emotionally insensitive, they don't have a clue that anything's wrong if the answer they get to "what's the matter?" is "nothing". I happen to be one of them.

Therefore, I say scrap the entire thing.

[Sage]

Originally Posted by Squinky

True. Would you, however, agree that women and men are held to different standards when it comes to what constitutes "polite" behaviour on their part?

I will concede that the standards for "socially tolerable" behavior can be quite different between men and women, but the standard for "polite" behavior is equally stringent for both sexes.

Originally Posted by Squinky

Give me an example, and please refrain from using evolutionary psychology, if possible.

I'm not sure in what context you mean "evolutionary psychology", so I'll blunder on and see how it goes.
Over the years I've worked with various people who never seemed to see the good in anything. If it was a beautiful sunny day, they complained that the sun hurt their eyes (while indoors, mind you)/the crops are gonna dry out and fail (the few crops not destroyed by the previous week's flooding, that is)/the happy children playing across the street were being too noisy (at 2:00 in the afternoon, not 2:00 am). The only time I ever saw these people smile or laugh was upon their hearing of someone else's misfortune.

Originally Posted by Squinky

Actually, it's the "simply do not possess" that I'm least happy with, because I have known and known of men who are just as emotionally expressive and sensitive, if not moreso, than what society paints as the "average" woman. Such men range from famous poets in classic literature to certain regulars on these very forums. I also know women who are so emotionally insensitive, they don't have a clue that anything's wrong if the answer they get to "what's the matter?" is "nothing". I happen to be one of them.

But would you concede that the examples you give (which I don't dispute) are exceptional individuals who fall outside of the norm?

Originally Posted by Squinky

Therefore, I say scrap the entire thing.

That, Ma'am, I cannot do. It's my honest opinion based on a lifetime's observations. I will, however, admit that there are exceptions.

[rlpw]

Squinky hun. I have to admit that most men aren't as emotionally sensitive as women. The one thing that has always bothered me is men who consider women as property or just sexual conquests. If I hear a guy talking about his companion for the evening as 'my whore' he is about to get an earful.
I really do have to admit that in my home we do have customary roles. I am the head of the household and usually have the final say. I'm not ugly about it and do not completely dismiss Mrs.R in decisions since that would be rude. And if she thinks I made the wrong decision trust me, I hear about it.
Oh, and don't be to hard on Gilli, he has not been probably hasn't exposed to any woman emotionally except his mother.

[SSH]

Originally Posted by Giligan

Seriously, I'm straight, but it's easy to understand why some guys are gay.

Heh, of course they just are gay to avoid having to deal with feminine hygiene products! If only the catholic church realised this they could market the celibate priesthood better...