[Wormsie]

Because I'm dying to get some discussion here, I'll do something unusual. I'm actually feeling embarrased, but what the heck!

This is an old composition I wrote. It could have been a lot better, but I think me writing it was the reason it was doomed from the start. I haven't fixed the spelling errors. Also, the style is rather childish now that I think about it. By god I hope I've become a better writer during these few years! I removed the last paragraph as it was totally unintelligible.

Find the 25 mistakes At one point in the text I even contradict myself - at least almost, haha. I had to tell some half-truths as I wasn't able to form an understandable sentence otherwise, thinking that my English teacher doesn't know anything about biology after all.

Cloning

As technology has developed and knowledge in biology and other sciences has rapidly increased during the last one hundred years, new ethical questions concerning the use of modern technology have surfaced. This is only natural, as with the arrival of most inventions – such as x-rays and television – people have been worried about their new possibilities. Lately the media has paid much attention to the subject of cloning - purely because of its sensational value. Cloning is something that stimulates people’s imagination because it has been associated with science fiction horror stories. Mary Shelley’s novel "Frankenstein" has been mentioned more than once as an example of what happens if we try to create life.

In fact, there has been so much talk about cloning that occasionally it seems to have developed to the stage of hysteria. While religious leaders are loudly voicing their opinion against cloning, some people who are keen on making cloning a business are already trying to clone a human being in the very near future. In fact, if you believe the mysterious Rael-cult, the first cloned people are already born! All these things have made cloning sound even more notorious and forbidden. Some people think that if we succeed in cloning we have taken another step closer to getting the powers of a god. It’s no wonder most Finns don’t approve of cloning!

People who are against cloning usually have two arguments. The first one is the concern that dictators could "grow hundreds of cloned babies in vats" and train them to be obedient soldiers who would be used in taking over the world. The second statement is that there’s something principally wrong in cloning, in "interfering with God’s work".

The benefits of cloning human beings and animals are not clear to me, but they aren’t to many other people either. The Scottish scientist Ian Wilmut, who cloned the legendary Dolly-sheep, says there are huge risks in cloning human beings. For example, one of seven born cloned calves dies because of major disturbances in its development. Besides, dictators can get their loyal soldiers in much easier ways than cloning.

When talking about cloning people often think that scientists’ main goal is to clone human beings, plants or animals - reproductive cloning. Actually, scientists are more interested in cloning cells, because it’s more useful than cloning animals. The goal is to be able to make stem cells. They are the cells from which all other cells are made of. This would open new medical possibilities. For example, you’d no longer need a donated heart: instead you could have a new, suitable heart made using the information from your own cells. Many illnesses previously thought incurable, such as the Alzheimer’s disease, could be cured with this kind of therapeutic cloning. Unfortunately this is not yet possible.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

In fact, I don't think this will help at all. Boring! But at least I've tried

[Garyos]

I'm glad you're not writing for a serious Science Magazine, Wormie.... I can't spot any glaring mistakes at all! (After having skimmed it)

[Bard09]

Originally Posted by deadworm222

Cloning

Oh, I love discussing cloning! We should have a thread on it!

What kind of mistakes were you looking for, deadworm222? Grammatical or fact-checking? Asking me to edit a paper is like opening up a can of worms I apologize if I'm a little aggressive. I love words and language, but I can climb on to a pedestal with them occaisionally.

1. Mary Shelley’s novel "Frankenstein" -> Mary Shelley’s novel Frankenstein
2. "interfering with God’s work". -> "interfering with God's work."
3. me, but they aren’t to many other people either. -> me, but they aren't clear to many other people, either.
4. one of seven born cloned calves dies -> one in seven cloned calves die
5. major disturbances in its development -> major disturbaces in their development
6. When talking about cloning people often -> When talking about cloning, people often
7. to make stem cells. They are the cells from which -> to make stem cells, from which
8. a donated heart: instead you -> a donated heart. Instead, you
9. Unfortunately this is not yet possible. -> Unfortunately, this is not yet possible.

As an essay, almost every paragraph could have used more fleshing out. Defining more of your terms would have been nice, as well as using shorter "bridging" sentences and utilizing more transitional statements. You also seemed a little unclear as to your voice in the article. Depending on the audience, you might want to remove all references to yourself to keep the piece in third-person. In addition, some of your conventions are often frowned on in grammar, but are not illegal per say. One example is is your usage ofcontractions. Sometimes they can improve the flow of a sentence, but often times they become overused. I'm not exactly sure where you stand on them, but you might want to look into it!

So there's my cursory edit of the piece, deadworm222. Hopefully, I didn't rile too many feathers...

I was wondering, though-- what is your opinion on cloning?

[Curt]

Originally Posted by Bard09

5. major disturbances in its development -> major disturbaces in their development

5. major disturbances in its development -> major disturbaces in their development --> major disturbances in their development

Sorry, couldn't resist. Shoot me ! Shoot me now!

[Tamara]

Ooooh, a man after my own heart. Here, have some of your blood back

[Tamara]

However.

"interfering with God’s work". -> "interfering with God's work."

According to my Linguistics textbook, that's a US/UK difference. His version is correct in British English. Or in other words, it's simply correct, end of story.

[Bard09]

Originally Posted by Tamara

However.

According to my Linguistics textbook, that's a US/UK difference. His version is correct in British English. Or in other words, it's simply correct, end of story.

Oh, wow. I actually did not know this! I got flack about the rule before and have been hung up about it since How do you determine when reading a paper if its in US or UK English? Is it the author's background or are there some trademark differences?

[Wormsie]

Mine is a mix of both, really, as we read both American English and British English at school, but it's almost impossible for me to remember which style is which.

Thanks for the tips, Bard09.

I put 25 because I thought that was a sufficiently high number

[Curt]

Originally Posted by deadworm222

Mine is a mix of both, really, as we read both American English and British English at school, but it's almost impossible for me to remember which style is which.

That's easy - or should I say "to expand on what Tamz said" - if you get marked down you've used American English, if you get marked up you've used British English.

[Tamara]

easiest way to tell what the author is using is to look at the spelling .. there's loads of words British English and American English spell differently. As a general rule though deadworm you should be consistent; pick one and stick to it.

[Wormsie]

I know there's some stuff with irregular verbs and some words and the z-s thing, but I can never remember which is which. And I can't be botherred to check because the teacher will give me full marks anyway. Or nearly full marks, which is good enough.

[mycroft]

I have nothing to contribute to this thread.

However,I do know a bad cloning joke.And since joke central is nowhere to be found,I figured this thread is the next best thing.

Before we clone humans,we have to understand the legal subtleties that may arise.For example,if you push your naked clone off a building.Would you get arrested for...

1.Murder
2.Suicide
3.Making an obscene clone fall.